Just got a call from my ma, asking whether I could make my gma's b-day dinner today. I said I'd be there, then got directions. I'm not sure how many will be with us, but I know my sister, her husband & kids will be there, and I haven't seen them in months (last year!?) so that will be nice.
Unfortunately, during the call my ma asked if she'd told me about the painful lump my gma has on her neck (she hadn't). Turns out, it's cancer. The surgeon said he couldn't do anything for it, because my gma's too frail for anesthesia. I guess they have an appt next week with some cancer center, but it sounds like the only other option is radiation & chemo, and ma & I know that she won't accept that, knowing how terrible it was when she watched my gpa (her husband) go through that process.
It looks like the only option is going to be keeping her comfortable (with pain meds) until it claims her. I'm honestly a bit angry about the whole thing - if it's inoperable & terminal, why should she be forced to suffer by waiting until it takes her life? She's told us for years, she's ready to go, and that she never wants to go through what her husband did. Why isn't physician-assisted euthanasia allowed? This is the exact situation it should be applied.
I guarantee, if I ever get to that point, I will have saved up enough medication to deal with it myself, and I'll have a living will with a "Do Not Resuscitate" clause in it.
I hope we all can get through this meal without it getting somber.
11:58 a.m. - 2018-12-29
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