I think I figured out why today was so hard. When I first arrived, grandma looked physically just as much of a shell as grandpa had when he passed. It was one of the hardest days of my life, to sit with him and put on a brave face so that he might have some peace during his transition to the next plane.
The images I have of her, of him, of holding his hand when he passed... it was important, but I don't want to do it again. Unfortunately, I'm the only one who can really be strong enough for my ma. She's running away/avoiding it, and I don't think she'll be able to handle it again. I may be wrong, but I don't know - she couldn't even stay with her pup when she passed, how will she handle this, when it happens?
9:08 p.m. - 2019-02-24
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