Really should know better than to get my hopes up. Finally had to text CC tonight because I hadn't heard anything about whether she'd be coming this way this weekend. Got a one sentence reply, essentially saying she couldn't work things out with the interview place, so she decided not to go. I replied 1st that I was sorry it didn't work out for her, then about how I was bummed out (paraphrased) that I wouldn't be seeing her, and wondering if maybe we could try to plan something for spring, then I asked if she had any other options available, job-wise. No reply for an hour, so I sent a text back saying she didn't need to reply tonight if she wasn't up for it, but I wondered if she was doing ok, and asked her to reply to me when she could.
As DangerSpouse is so good at pointing out, yes, I'm over-thinking things, but that's what I do. *shrugs* Part of me feels like it was out of line to mention my disappointment when she was obviously dealing with her own. Part of me thinks that's silly & I'm free to express what I'm thinking as long as I'm considerate & respectful about it. Another part of me is honestly a little pissed off that she didn't bother to contact me & tell me any of this, and I wonder if I hadn't texted tonight, if she would have ever let me know. I know a lot of other people who wouldn't have hesitated to complain about that lack of consideration for my time, but then, I'm not a lot of people & I do understand, especially considering she's been dealing with a relationship that's going south, and the only job opportunity she had this year never got off the ground. She deals with depression too, and if there's anyone who understands that, it's me.
So, I don't know what to do, but I'll probably just give her space & wait to see if she contacts me again. I mean, it's all really up to her, whether we talk/meet up again. (I was going to say that I'm not going to wait around for her, but honestly, I kind of wonder if that's what I've been doing, with all the "not dating" that's been going on.)
I really live in my head too much... but that's what you do when you're alone for decades, isn't it?
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