So I'm not sure how this is going to go - KW is having issues with the guy she's seeing. He's insecure, needy, and clingy, wants to be with her all the time, etc. She had decided last week that things were going too fast with them (she'd stayed with him/seen him six days last week) and told him they needed to slow down. Now, he thinks that she's seeing someone else (which is only sort-of true, he knows we're friends, dated, and still talk) and is convinced she's going to leave him. She thought it was ironic that his insecurity about her leaving might be the thing that breaks them up. Anyway, she texted me last night that he was coming over so they could "talk". I asked her straight out if she thought our attraction to each other, and our hanging out, was interfering with her being able to give enough to her relationship to see if it would work. She said she didn't know, but that she wasn't able/ready to get over her attraction to me.
Here's my dilemma - we already know that we will never be a long-term item. If she breaks up with this guy & is single again, we're both going to want to get back into a physical relationship with each other. Part of me would welcome that, and yet another part is concerned that, like with Viv, even though we'd discussed things not going anywhere, she might get more attached than is good for her (or I might, for that matter). I guess I don't know if, should the opportunity arise, I should pursue a physical relationship with her. Sure, it would be fun, and probably a healthy thing for me mentally, but I wonder if the fallout when it's over will be worth it.
Also, and I'm not sure I've mentioned this, she tends to be jealous, so if I were to find/start dating someone new (HA! Yeah, right, whatever dood...) I'd have to face that. Obviously, I couldn't *not* tell her, but I'd really be hesitant to bring it up. Maybe it'd be better to find a way to limit our intimacy to just a few times, or just an occasional thing or something, so it doesn't seem like/become a long-term dating thing? Might be a good way to limit the damage/fallout.
Fuck, I don't know. I really want to sleep with her again, though!
12:42 p.m. - 2014-09-23
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