Drinks home alone last night, drinks out on the cycle tonight, if the weather holds.
Was going to leave it at that, but I should go ahead & put a few things down, else I'll forget to later. Got the drywall repaired in the bedroom, went to sand it, realized I don't have any sandpaper in the house. I need to sand before I clean the walls, then I can paint both the room, and the silly hall/bath cabinets doors I forgot about.
I got a few texts from people I never hear from, for the holidays; one from the joker (a generic 'to all' type message, which was discouraging in and of itself), one from a lady-friend I'd stayed with on my trip back from key west that I've seen twice in as many years if that, and one from the eastern-bloc waitress, whom I hadn't talked to in a while. We ended up sending several texts, so at least I know she's not totally pissed off at me or anything (for dropping off the radar, so to speak). We might hang out sometime soon, but nothing firm.
I sat for literally almost a half-hour, phone in my hand, debating on texting the Gambler to wish her a happy holiday. Finally decided against it, as people know each other, and I didn't want to run the risk of having to explain why I'm avoiding some people & not others. I'm sure that doesn't make any sense to you, but trust me, it would have been an issue, had it come up. Still want to, as I really miss her, but I won't. No point in it.
Anyway, I've missed my last 1-2 workouts, but I don't feel all that bad about it. I'll pick it up tomorrow & get back into it, before I continue working on the house. It's the damn holidays, and if I choose to spend it avoiding my feelings with drink, then I will, damnit! ;-)
I hope I can find something to do for NYE - the last several years (barring last) I just sat home alone with a bottle of captain. Last year, I spent at a local bar, standing off to the side, apparently looking so forlorn that when midnight struck, a woman I've never seen before said I looked like I could use a hug, and proceeded to give me one. It was a nice gesture, but gods, how sad.
So, what to do this year? No idea, but I hope I come up with something better than either of those choices...
8:57 p.m. - 2011-12-26
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