I'm on vacation for the next couple weeks, then I work Dec 3-6th, then I'm off again until Jan 3rd. My company changed their vacation policy to "use it or lose it" this year, so I couldn't carry it over.
Normally, I look forward to not having to go to work, and for the 1st few days, I enjoy it but then, I realize how isolated I am when I don't interact with colleagues, and I get depressed. Living with depression (or at least, trying to) is such a crap-fest, especially when things get bad. The worse I feel, the more I need to be around people with whom I feel some kind of connection, and the less able I am to reach out because I feel like a burden. Ok, *more* of a burden...
Anyway, I've been trying to think of things to do, people to whom I can reach out, and have done so, to exactly three people; Viv, GRJ, and "A" from the Well (that last one was a mistake, but I did it last Sunday after having had several drinks. I likely won't contact her again). Speaking of last Sunday, that's the last time I had a drink as well, and I think I'm going to try to keep that up for a while. I'm just a bit concerned about what I'll do though, as there are only a few places that come to mind when I think about places I enjoy being - on my couch reading a book & listening to records, driving (motorcycle or car), and two of the local breweries. As I'm not yet ready to go to the last two without drinking, that leaves my house/vehicle, both of which are solitary endeavors. That's not an encouraging thought. I could drive to the lakeshore & hang out, but the only options there are one of the beaches/piers (a guaranteed solo endeavor when it's this cold out), or (again) breweries.
I did look around for a beginner's running group (as I just started that back up yesterday) but there aren't any on meetup within 25 miles, so that's out. In fact, I looked for *any* interesting local meetup groups nearby, but there's nothing at all that caught my attention. I guess for this 1st week off, I'll just work on getting the house in order, straightening up/organizing/cleaning/etc.
Man, I really wish I knew how to make friends outside of the bar scene. I guess I'll just have to wait & see if Viv or GRJ get back to me.
I also really wish you d-land people lived closer. You're the closest friends I have - pretty sad, isn't it? *sigh*
1:17 p.m. - 2018-11-17
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