1) i've been out tonight, and hence do not feel like exerting the effort to properly capitalize this entry - bugger off!
2) i ran into my mother tonight at my buddy huey's "ladies' night". i'm guessing it was her social club's monthly night out, as i met tons of her "friends". fortunately, i was in a decent mood and it wasn't awkward at all.
3) had 3 drinks at the dog, ended up at shakes, where i had 4(?) more? i sang two songs, talked to more than a few people, but left, as i was feeling comepletely alone, as per usual.
4) earlier today, i had this urge to go home earlier than usual on lunch. i literally made it home with less than 30 seconds to spare before it started raining ( i was on the cycle). tonight, i left the bar and walked to the bike with the tiniest of raindrops falling on me - took a very direct route home, and managed to do the same thing. literally, less than a minute after i parked the bike in the garage, it start raining.
5) number 4 is the full extent of my luck in life.
6) tomorrow morning when i have to go to work, i will likely be kicking myself, and feeling like a complete ass for having been so weak as to fall prey to the inebriation trap. i will also likely beat myself up to the point where i no longer want to admit my existence beyond my internal struggles.
7) i miss CC.
8) i miss having someone.
9) i should just give up. that's what any smart, sane person would do... i, of course, am neither of those things...
10) feel privileged if you actually see this entry - in all likelihood, i will have deleted it upon waking in the morning.
2:31 a.m. - 2012-07-19
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