My, but I'm discouraged tonight...This night was both an educational and disheartening evening. On the one hand, I did learn that blue-eyes is of legal drinking age, because I saw her at the bar tonight. On the other hand, I learned that she's dating a friend of mine. This is the kind of a "friend" where I seriously debate whether I could date her after he has.
Anyway, now my mind is running through the scenarios where, if I were brave enough, I could've asked her out a while ago. I mean, if she'll date this guy, I would have been a shoe-in. Fact is, though, he obviously has that kind of courage/charisma, and I don't. Makes me realize again that I don't have the skills/confidence to meet someone on my own, and that indicates, like I've always said, that I'm going to be single for the rest of my life. Yes, I realize that sounds like I'm being melodramatic and a bit over-reactionary, but I don't think so. It's enough to make me not want to go out again, because if I do, I know that all it will result in is my saying "hi" to a few people I know, and then watching them wander off to talk with their friends.
Anyway, I'm digressing... should I mention, next time I see her, that I didn't know that she knew my friend? Or should I let it go & see if she says something? And, why the fuck do I care? At this point, it seems a bit pointless, really.
*sigh*
2:03 a.m. - 2012-05-13
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