Today marks the 10th time in the last couple weeks, where I've written a nice, long entry, only to re-read it and then delete it because I sound like such a whiny little shit. The bitch of it is, having written about a lot of things, I now can't tell what I've actually told people, and what I've written to myself, and what I've not written, but gone over in my head, so every time I write now, I sound to me like I'm just repeating myself, even if nobody's actually heard/read anything before. Does that make any sense?
Is it worth $50-60 every week or two, to have a friend to talk with? I'm feeling a bit trapped, isolated, and have been thinking about calling up my old counselor for an appointment, but I can't bring myself to do it. I've nothing new to discuss, nothing he hasn't heard before, nothing I haven't said before, so why bother? It's not like saying it out loud is going to miraculously make it all better, right? I can't even comfortably talk here, for some reason.
Life is frustrating.
9:59 a.m. - 2009-07-29
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