Everything for the last week or so has been a struggle, mentally. I've had to fight to push myself to go out to the garage for every workout; today, I gave in and am skipping it because I just don't care. I'm also finding it a struggle to eat well. I don't enjoy eating anything I make anymore, and I've been resorting to eating cereal (oats, fruit & nuts in the mornings, cheerios in the evenings, whatever I made a week or two ago that was left in the freezer for lunches, and protein shakes). Haven't even been able to motivate myself to cook for the last couple weeks. Nothing sounds appetizing,and the thought of making anything more complicated than cereal seems like too much effort, so I just don't bother.
I'm sure it's because I'm again feeling that life alone is pointless, so why bother putting any effort into it. I'm also feeling hopeless again, about my future, about finding my place in life; where I belong, finding my people, finding love... Without those things, life feels empty, and like it always will be. Some days, it just seems so hard to carry on feeling completely on your own.
Hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow.
4:16 p.m. - 2022-03-22
Recent entries:
2nd update - cold exposure - 2022-04-02
New Strongman Equipment, and today's workout chart. - 2022-04-02
New fitness purchases. - 2022-03-26
Another piece. - 2022-03-24
Very confusing. - 2022-03-22
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