Today ended up being an awful day. Not that it was any different than any of my other days, but I felt mentally good this morning, had errands to run, and for some reason felt like I might actually meet an interesting woman. No idea why I'd feel that way, as I didn't have any weird/unusual dreams, nor was I watching any shows yesterday that would explain this misplaced hope, but I really wanted that to happen today.
I made it home after going three different places, without incident (good or bad), but the feeling was still here, so I went onto my online dating profiles, but they proved as futile as ever. I've had the strongest urge today to just hold a woman in my arms, and be held in return. I guess I'm just really missing physical contact of some sort. You know, it might not even be physical contact, now that I think about it, it could just be that I'm missing close social interaction with a woman, even if just a good, in-depth conversation & connection.
Or, to minimize my feelings, it could just be the 'holiday blues'... I've been struggling to eat much recently, so maybe it's just depression again? Why can just one little thing like this make the rest of life so discouraging? I really wish I was still able to drink, I'd be at the bar right now.
7:01 p.m. - 2022-12-21
Recent entries:
Interesting new YT channel - 2022-12-27
Reminder, reasons. - 2022-12-26
Same old... - 2022-12-25
Random appropriateness - 2022-12-23
Conclusion. - 2022-12-22
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